I have arrived at work at 7 am two days running now, which means I left home at 6 am, which really means I can�t sleep past 5 am and I figure I may as well get some work done so why don�t I go to work? Wonder how long this new trend will last.

This morning the GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING TRUCK broke. Luckily I got here, but it ain�t about to start again. It�s so frustrating. Both the car and the truck are way too fucking temperamental for us to be using them for commuting. We haven�t got a choice in the matter though because we are broke and will be broke for the foreseeable future because everything has to go into the house or to debt. We got piles and piles of debt. Plus we can�t finance a car or anything now because of the house and the debt.

Damn.

It�s a muddle.

Also. I got 40 compare/contrast papers to grade from my literature classes. I got 40 reading journals to check. I am getting 45 definition papers from my writing classes this week. And I got essay tests and reading journals to grade from my British Lit. class. And midterm exams next week.

Damn.

Remind me never to teach a distance class again. No no, I change my mind�it�s actually a-ok�it�s just, the fucking students in that class. I have about 6 or 7 of them who disappear for weeks and then suddenly they reappear and expect to turn in all of their missing work. I tell them no and they get so damned pissy with me. I start hearing shit about husbands having strokes, husbands leaving, hospitals, grandmothers, sickness, failed emails, every damned thing. I just want them to stop it. What�s really great are the ones who try to make me feel ohsoguilty for assigning them the grades they earn because if they don�t pass this class they lose their financial aid and their husbands just left them and they got kids and somehow it�s my fault they didn�t do the damned work (it was confusing! I can�t understand the questions! Every time I try to write I see my husband cheating on me all over again!). Fuck it.

See? I�m turning into a republican, aren�t I.

My parents are coming next week. Sigh.

No cigarettes since Sunday morning, y�all. I am 100% confident that this is a done deal. But the universe does seem to be testing that resolve, no?