You know what I need to remember to do every day? Take my mega B vitamin. They cost a dang fortune from the co-op, but they are, for real, my magic happy pills. We ran out awhile back and Jeff bought some cheap ones from the grocery store and my life has been shit ever since (or at least really really exhausting). I started back on the good ones on Sunday and I am ready to pick you up right over my head.

I'm freaking out a little bit because we're having a party in a couple of weeks. I don't think I've ever in all my life hosted a party. Ain't my style, man. But our really awesome pal, who just so happens to be Molly too, is organizing this shindig as a work party to get us in our house (which may or not happen--but it will get us close, I reckon) and how can you say no? So many nice people are coming to lend a hand. Makes me want to hide under a rock or leave town or something. That's not even right.

Our great great great babysitter said she'd come, though, to watch over Oz. Thank the gods--ain't no way I'll have it in me at 38 weeks pregnant, in July, to be around people I mostly only know from other parties and to watch over Ossie playing (with kids! heaven! but crazed!). I feel like such a loser at times like these.

Our babysitter though. I. love. her. She actually lives in Ramseur, but we met her when we moved over here. Her mom used to work at the place Jeff got his allergy shots. Karyssa (babysitter) graduated from high school in December and sometimes came to work with her mom because she didn't have anything else to do. She's soooo quiet and shy and I don't think has a lot of friends. How can I not love this girl? Anyway, she started babysitting Ossie and now she comes over every day and they love each other like crazy. She's so sweet and gentle with Ossie--that's what I love.

We had this other babysitter, who has a degree in early childhood development and is all organic and has a million great activities planned for her babysittees and who is all gentle discipline/attachment parenting guru lady. But she railroads people. She ain't nothin but a big bully, I think. Plus, I found her at mothering.com and read a few of her posts and she wrote that any mother who works and leaves her kid with someone else makes her want to puke. We stopped using her the next day. I hate her. I still get so mad when I think about that.

Karyssa, on the other hand, listens to Ossie and really sees him. Breaks me up just thinking about it. She's a person who it feels restful just being around, you know? You don't have to talk or do anything around her.

She had a graduation party a couple of weeks back that we went to--her family is redneck as hell and so sweet, like her. Like if you just looked at them you'd think they were this one way--smoking and bleach blond. Me? I always get scared that folks like that are going to hit their kids (too many years over there in Randolph county, I swear). But then you hang out with them and they are really really great. So good to their kids and to each other and to us. Loved 'em. Karyssa made a fruit salad and put it into a basket that she she carved out a watermelon. It about broke my heart thinking of her doing that. I don't know why.

So she's going to come stay with Ossie when this new baby decides to come out. We've also got some other friends who'll be around for helping out and Blythe says she'll come right away (yay!). This is all so different from when Ossie was born. We didn't even have anybody to show off our baby to until visitors from out of town came. I'm glad we moved.

Which is all to say: I HAVE TO GRADE MIDTERMS RIGHT NOW NO FOOLING. Bye.