I have thought of writing in this diary for the last two days and I�ve even written entries which I did not post because the thought of actually putting words up here has started to revolt me.

It�s just a phase. I been here before. But when I get up in the morning and find a new post from both Frances and Bathsheba, I cannot help but want to put a bit of the old Molu into the world.

But I was thinking lately how much this diary is not me. Not actually me at all. It�s not even a reflection, which is the metaphor I had been using in my head�it�s more of a dark shadow demon clumping along behind me. Yep, revulsion. Maybe I need a longer break.

Another good woman to mourn for today, June Carter Cash. Makes me think of that Steve Earle song�here�s some of it:

There's foxes in the hen house
Cows out in the corn
The unions have been busted
Their proud red banners torn
To listen to the radio
You'd think that all was well
But you and me and Cisco know
It's going straight to hell

So come back, Emma Goldman
Rise up, old Joe Hill
The barracades are goin' up
They cannot break our will
Come back to us, Malcolm X
And Martin Luther King
We're marching into Selma
As the bells of freedom ring

So come back Woody Guthrie
Come back to us now
Tear your eyes from paradise
And rise again somehow
If you run into Jesus
Maybe he can help you out
Come back Woody Guthrie to us now

Addendum
I no longer add new entries, I merely edit old ones. Whatever. It's just a phase. Ok. Anyway this is what I wanted to say: I�ve developed a crush on this boy here at work. Yeah, no kidding. This fella is a library science graduate student and he cracks me up. He�s wearing this outfit today, which is the outfit he wears every day pretty much, green polo shirt, red shorts, black socks, sandals. Someone just said to him, you�re wearing black socks. And he said, don�t mess with the fashion. And then that same someone said, you dress like an old man. And then he said, I dress like a German tourist. On vacation. In Spain. I have never really ever spoken to this fella. I mean, I have, but all business. But I like to hear him talk over there. He�s hilarious and smart and goofy and friendly. Sigh.

Addendum #2!
Blythe told me last night that she's started a diary here at diaryland! I am all excitement! She just lost the password! But when she finds it and starts writing! My Blythe! Yippee!