I love this quiet. Jeff and the kids are running errands so the only sound is me, typing. I should be either grading or out walking--I'll do the latter just as soon as I'm done here. I am never very good with time management.

I think I'm feeling mas mas better. I noticed this the other day--last Tuesday. I had a terrible no good very bad day on Tuesday, but it did allow me to see how few and far between these days are becoming. We were in Boone--went there for conference with my work. That was actually pretty fun. We got to stay at hotel and have a vacation paid for by the school (hopefully, if I can find receipts--I'm such a dummy). We ate nice foods and walked a lot and Ossie was totally charming and learned a whole new level of sentence construction. It was cool. We left on Tuesday and I got into a funk because of work-related matters--it's all really stupid politics. Reminds me of when I was in the writing program. Ugh. I need to just let all that shit GO and just teach my damned classes and ignore all the rest. I wish I wish I wish I could get a transfer away from the main campus to the nice green hippie campus in P-boro. I'm not very good about being zen in the face of all this. I'm going to work on it, though because I really doubt that transfer will ever happen. Alas.

The good news: we got rain! And rain and rain! Last night the creek was still just little puddles barely linked together. Today? It's a veritable river. I cannot express the relief and happiness--I missed our creek. It's been completely dry since Matilda was born. And yesterday afternoon we went on a hike at the lake and saw three blue herons and one eagle's nest. Ossie ran most of the way. How awesome to see him in this place I used to walk when Basho was just a pup. I'd go there every day I could, with book and smokes and coffee, and Basho would play in the water and I would drink it all in.

I would like to be happy. I am not interested in this sadness and melancholy any more. It's just not interesting. There's some part of me that seems to think it is, I reckon. Isn't that the stupidest thing you've ever heard? I want a clean house and a clean spirit.

Peaches is such a cat--she's laying curled behind me on the couch. The day is absolutely gorgeous and I'm not wasting anymore of it in front of this blamed machine. Ciao all my pretty ones.